So, our first weekend living on the mainland, somehow we inadvertently became wedding crashers! (As you do!) It was Sunday after all and following a mammoth Saturday exploring Xi'an, we decided the "Beach BBQ" under fairy lights sounded rather inviting for us newbies in town. After a lazy morning, we high-tailed it out to one of Xi'an's 'other' premier hotels where the "beach" BBQ takes place each week. 45 minutes later after some rather manic, bumper to bumper traffic, where the road rules are harder to decipher than Chinese characters (er, what road rules?) we arrived (in tact) at our destination. Ok - so our man-made beach was a little on the disappointing side….but coming from Australia, really who was I kidding! In my mind I was (naively) hoping for this... But what we got - in the middle of China - (of course!!) was this… Not to be discouraged, we settled ourselves back on one of the wooden 'beach' chairs and felt the.... ah... sand between our toes... to watch the evening unfold; meanwhile Ava wasted no time in familiarizing herself with this ever so conveniently located pirate-ship playground! In no time she had a flock of local kids (and adults) around her, apparently keen to adopt her as their English tutor for the day (the adults more so than the kids I have to say)! They no doubt thought they'd hit the jackpot stumbling across this blonde pocket-rocket who's favorite hobby is talking! I'm sure I could hear her revealing our family secrets - (just as well their English wasn't at the advanced stages). It was about now we noticed the big 'faux' beach truck on the gritty fake sand being loaded with pretty pink balloons, and each chair with one pink balloon strategically 'stuck' to the back of it. A rose archway magically appeared, the brightly colored pirate playground making a unique backdrop, along with a couple of blinding spot lights beaming in on the wooden tables with their blue plastic tablecloths and crockery steins bearing serviettes and chopsticks. The BBQ buffet we'd come for was coming to life, so we thought we'd better get ourselves off the beach (as enticing as it was) for a spot closer to the food action. We propped ourselves where we could still see Ava bouncing on the seesaw (or coming face-first down the slide) with her new friends - by now mostly bigger boys about eight or nine, whom she had no qualms about bossing around! The crowd started swelling as the wedding guests arrived for this auspicious occasion. First things first, this was clearly a low key affair. It was mostly a jeans and t-shirt dress code with the odd, sparkly head band and diamante shoes - that came to life under the spotlights. (Pretty much like the city of Xi'an itself, I'm discovering!) So we watched on with amusement as everyone casually took their seats as if it was just another Sunday barbie, which in all reality, it was. By now, we started realizing we might be a little too close for comfort to the wedding party…. but apparently, according to the hotel staff - this was perfectly fine and normal! The regular diners carried on chewing their beef skewers under the stars (slightly obscured by the polluted hazy sky) blissfully unaware of the nuptials taking place. Sooner rather than later, the bride and groom appeared in all their spectacular glory, the bride looking every bit as glamorous as you might expect a bride to be, in her silk white gown and tiara -- dashing groom at her side. I'm choosing to think these two hadn't met at one of China's “Marriage Markets” whereby parents desperate for their daughter to marry put out an ad including their age, height and salary! I wasn't sure what was about to take place but assumed the proper ceremony must have taken place earlier for things to be 'oh so relaxed.' Alas this was not the case, a 'man with a mike' appeared on the beach party bus, looking like he might like to roar off into the Hawaiian sunset at any moment. Rattling off his well rehearsed speech (in mandarin of course), the bride and groom made their way down the "aisle" to a ballad of classical Chinese tunes. It was about now everyone clambered around 'our' table to get a good view of the action! I tried in earnest to hear a word here and there… but managed little more than 'I do' - clearly the exchange of rings helping my cause! Confetti poppers erupted and cheers broke out. I'm sure this is where they said "I now pronounce you man and wife" and I found myself clapping along and snapping photos! What?! Ava's new bestie "Fiona" was the flower girl and when her duty required letting off one of the confetti canisters, Ava was most disappointed she couldn't join the bridal party! Not to be outdone, as the happy couple made their way back to the dining area, I turned around to see her tagging along in line with the bride and flower girl, much to the giggles of several onlookers! According to Chinese custom, professional photographs are taken before the wedding ceremony, so it was time for the newlyweds to let their hair down! It was 'Campai' all round (also known as toasting)! The bride and groom stopping at each table, their steins raised in celebration (did I mention it was a German-themed BBQ)? I wouldn't have been at all surprised if they stopped by our table on their rounds. As I gingerly approached the buffet, I found myself ever so conspicuously in line with the wedding guests. Attempting to work out if the beef on metal skewers being sprayed with hot spices would blow my head off, I really was hoping the ground might just open up and swallow me. Ava, on the other hand, clearly not afraid to made her mark - snagging herself a party favour of chocolates, courtesy of the bride and groom; while I found myself watching the couple's happy moments on the big screen to the tune of Bruno Mars "Just the way you are!' Low and behold a shot of Sydney's Opera House flashed up, showing the loved up couple on Sydney Harbour. Ahhhhh.... way to make a girl feel homesick on a fake beach in north west China, eh! Ironically, rule #7 in the movie, Wedding Crashers was "Blend in by standing out" Well, maybe....just maybe.... we did! PS...it would seem the locals really aren't too fussed about who the guests are at their weddings! We just got an 'official' invite to a wedding next week from someone my husband has only spoken to twice. Oh, and he's been asked to give a speech. I think Ava and I will definitely be crashing that! … [Read more...]
Living in China: Week One – One Foot in Front of the Other
You know the feeling when you visit a city you've never seen before? That dizzying anticipation, the unbridled excitement, the curiosity and wonder of what lies ahead? Well, can I just say - for the record - arriving in a city you've never seen before to live, is nothing like that! Ok, so maybe that's a little over the top. The lead up to moving to Xi'an, China was like that, but actually arriving in one of the world's oldest cities, home to eight and a half million people (the 12th largest city in China), I won't lie - my heart was in my mouth. It's a short two and a half hour flight from Hong Kong, but it also feels a world away in north western China. As we disembarked and entered the airport, my stomach was in knots, as I tried desperately to keep an open mind, at the ready to embrace our new home! I foolishly found myself comparing right off the bat. (Bad move!) The airport was significantly smaller than I'd expected for such a massive city and ever so slightly primitive (of course this is compared to Hong Kong's modern, state of the art, award-winning complex)! I later found out all entrants from Hong Kong, Macau and Taiwan (China's SARS) come to their own individual terminal, so what I glimpsed was just a minuscule part of the largest airport in the north west! I could feel myself ever so tentatively putting one foot in front of the other as I literally stepped into my new life, in one of China's 656 cities, no less! Driving from the airport was at best 'underwhelming' (apart from driving on the wrong side of the road) it was raining and grey as we sped through a maze of highways and concrete; a deluge of chinese characters beaming out at me in their neon, indecipherable glory! I'm not deeply religious but it was about now I silently had a word to God, hoping James wasn't having a moment of serious delusion when he'd excitedly told me the city was really "quite nice." Meantime, our little blondie Ava was oblivious in all her three year old naivety; her primary concern on the journey, the delightful hotel gift of rainbow-coloured macaroons and how many she could eat in one go! Oh to be so innocent. Approaching the hotel, my spirits lifted… despite the incessant rain, leafy green streets splayed out in front of me and there was a distinct buzz of activity with restaurants, bright lights and traffic mayhem! (We may be in Central China, but it was a comforting sign, I wasn't in the middle of no where, even if I was hanging on for dear life!) The hotel was impressive - it's four stories though, the 'chalk' to the W Hong Kong's 76 story 'cheese.' My grand entry somewhat stifled as Ava's prized macaroons promptly fell out of the car onto the wet hotel driveway and a toddler meltdown ensued. Welcome to Xi'an! We quickly dropped our bags off in what would be our home for the next few weeks (until the hotel residences are finished). A suite that can only be described as embracing the typical minimalist Westin decor brushed with an enchanting oriental flair! With James likely to be bunkered down in his new GM role the next day year, we went for a quick scoot around the hotel to acclimatize ourselves with our new 'home.' We probably could've done with scooters because it's ahem, bloody huge. Unlike Hong Kong, space is no issue here in Xi'an and it's spread out, from a luxurious Lobby Bar, to an intriguing museum (yes, Xi'an being one of the four oldest civilizations in the world means, monuments, relics and artifacts are scattered everywhere, even below this hotel!) - to a grand sunken garden swathed in red cloth. (It's lucky my favorite colour is red, because this hotel is literally bathed in a glow of deep red!) To the beckoning cake shop, the three very different restaurants, Chinese, Japanese and Western….and the (wait for it) Rolls Royce show room! (Ahem just quietly the owner has sold 70 of these babies in just two years! Oh how the Chinese looove their luxury!) So, let the week begin. I think I probably spent 24 hours in a 'blur of speechlessness.' It's fair to say the first week is probably the hardest when you move to a new country. I know I bandy about the term 'culture shock' on this blog on a pretty regular basis, but over four years in HK, even I had forgotten what it's really like. Really like to wake up and your husband is at work and you are staring out from your hotel window into the absolute unknown (rain not helping your imagination) it all seems quite surreal. This is your new life and you know not a single soul. There's no routine, no familiarity, you can't order a comforting Mint Mocha or get a blow dry because you can't find the relevant words and even when you do, they can't understand you. You don't even know what's across the road. It's a new beginning on almost every level. And I won't lie, it's bloody scary. Forget being a big fish in a small pond - you're a tadpole in a giant ocean! For the first few days and beyond, tears sit just below the surface, threatening to spill over at a moment's notice, but then you pull yourself together because you know it's not the end of the world and there is a big adventure that you have been waiting for, wanting for! All I can say, is thank God for technology, even if it is slow and more than slightly intermittent (and I may be on the verge of throwing laptop out the window), Facebook, What's App, Twitter, Email all allow you to stay connected (loosely) with friends, family and familiar faces. You'll be amazed at how comforting it is to know online, nothing has changed. (Thanks to a VPN of course.) What's a VPN? In layman's terms, it's a service you pay for monthly that allows you to download an app which makes it look like you are in another country so you can bypass security blocks and access the likes of Google, Facebook, even my own blog (all banned in China). So deep breaths all round, the key to being in a new city, is to get out! So once the rain calmed, first stop - the shopping centre directly across the road; a very westernized Starbucks with all staff speaking reasonably good English (no Mint Mochas though), a peek at the Giant Wild Goose Pagoda, you really can't miss. This is what this area's all about and it's what tourists from around the globe flock to look at. A roam around the streets, laced with green trees, striking monuments and waterfalls….it's a little European infused with traditional Chinese architecture. On the way back from another local shopping centre (thankfully sporting Zara and a kid's playroom worth it's weight in gold) I spy a street called 'Bar Street' that we eagerly try out a few nights later. A quirky cobblestoned street reminiscent of a Phuket or Bali or even Melbourne with cute, cottage like bars, side by side…live music, humming with people. A day in the heart of the city, we explore the city centre with the world famous Bell Tower and the ancient city wall - a 14 square kilometre cobble-stoned wall that you can cycle along on tandem bikes or do it the lazy way we did (this time) and jump on a golf buggy and hurtle around the historic fortress looking out across a sprawling city. **Quick Fact: It's the most complete city wall that's survived in China and the one of the largest ancient military defensive systems in the world! We stumble across quaint markets down idyllic lane ways not unlike a slice of Europe with fascinating artwork and oriental trinkets on display. So far, Xi'an is well and truly surprising us on every level….and slowly but surely it's about putting the pieces together. Working out which way is up. (Map reading is not my strong point!) You start to recognize the occasional landmark, hotel faces, and even more importantly remember a phrase or two of mandarin. Nevermind, that I told the housekeeper to come back to clean the room at 13 o'clock. Better luck next time eh? So a week in, it's been tough and more than likely to get tougher, but it's also the beginning of a once in a lifetime adventure, we'll certainly never forget. She chants the mantra, 'one foot in front of the other……' Proud to share this post over on Seychelle Mama's site for her series #MyExpatFamily … [Read more...]
It Takes a Small Village to Raise a Child in a Big City
It’s four days out from the big C (the “big C" being our imminent move to Central China). As you'd expect, I'm rushing around like the undoubtedly mad woman that I am, ticking off a ‘to do’ list longer than the Great Wall of China. Admittedly a lot of it involves ‘maintenance’ - all in preparation for a potential lack of hairdressers able to colour blonde hair or my inability to track down a decent manicurist. (First world problems of course!) Then there are the trips to my local GP to stock up on medication for those unexpected illnesses and of course buying more panadol, deodorant and toothpaste than you can poke a proverbial stick at. (My husband keeps reminding me, we are not actually going to prison, but I'm choosing to go with the Girl Scout motto that is, "Be Prepared!") So when I'm not out buying in bulk, I'm staring into space (which mostly involves looking at a somewhat spectacular view of Hong Kong’s strapping skyscrapers, rolling mountains and sparkling seas) wrapped in a million memories, mourning this chapter that's coming to a close. It's always a weird feeling between moves. Stuck in limbo...not quite part of your old life, and yet not belonging in your future life. I will soon be staring out at a giant Wild Goose Pagoda. (Yes I can feel your sympathetic but slightly amused smirk from here.) My husband has already arrived in Xi’an. He’s been there for over a week and barely surfaced for air! Meantime, I sit here, desperate for him to throw me a bone, on life in the ancient capital. Amongst his own madness that is running a new hotel he knows little about, he’s thankfully thrown me a few morsels, mostly some grainy photos showcasing the surprisingly buzzing tourist area (including giant Pagoda) where we will make our home; informed me of the smoke-free hotel car (not always a given) with its English speaking driver; and illustrated the wide, leafy streets and his relief at the displays of English signage. Oh and the space. Coming from a place where space is like a prized cow at a fairground, I’ve gotta say, this is quite exciting. And let's not forget the pictures of Starbucks across the road! Priorities!! Still, I'm anxiously twiddling my thumbs, wondering what to expect, really expect! My heart pounds nervously as I scour Facebook pages on life in China, naturally Xi’an in particular. (Yes, encouragingly there are Facebook groups, even if Facebook is banned in China.) Naturally in between all of this I am frantically farewelling my butt off. (I can wish.) In between stocking piling supplies and gazing longingly at Hong Kong, I'm squeezing in afternoon teas at posh hotels, dinners at iconic city spots and foot massages in true oriental style, all with a bevy of warm and witty women I like to call 'my village.' Having arrived in the Fragrant Harbour four years ago, well and truly preggars, I missed out on the compulsory Hong Kong induction, that largely involves wild days on Junks and long nights in Lan Kwai Fong, where jelly shots rule the streets and you don't emerge until daylight beckons. I’ll admit, a part of me (clearly a much younger version of me) was ever so slightly disappointed… but I’ve managed to make up for it in other ways. (Ever tried Jelly shots at home!) Amongst the sleepless nights and coffee-fuelled days spent in a haze, as a first-time mother in a foreign country, believe it or not, I’ve managed to get Ava to the ripe old age of 3.5 without having her choke on chicken's feet or poke herself in the eye with a chopstick. Winning! Now as I go about my daily life, stopping to say goodbye to the people who’ve punctuated our lives, the phrase ‘It takes a small village to raise a child’ echoes in my mind. We might just be tiny specks in a bustling, fast and furious city of seven million people, but raising a child hasn’t been done alone. From our good friends on the block, to my invaluable helper (nanny) who has helped us on far too many levels to count from day dot; to Ava’s little pre-school downstairs where the teachers have treated us like family and are without hesitation throwing my girl a farewell party; to the local dry cleaners who’ve been giving Ava a lollipop every single visit, since well, well before she had teeth! It's these regular faces that make our world go round. There's also the W hotel’s warm and generous staff, who've constantly showered Ava with love, attention and unexpected gifts of kindness; the Starbucks staff who make my much-required Mint Mocha before I’ve even hit the counter and the ladies who've been scoping out a seat for us in the crowded coffee shop, since Ava was barely a week old….. there were the ladies in the clothes shop opposite who entertained Ava (or perhaps it was the other way around) while I took a brief sanity break, inhaling my coffee at high speed. There's the concierge staff downstairs in our apartment block who high-five Ava every single morning on the way out (even if she is going through the “don’t look at me, don’t talk to me" grumpy toddler phase); the security guards at the gate who make sure she gets across the road safely with a smile; to the ladies in the supermarket who’ve chatted to her enthusiastically in Cantonese every Saturday morning since the beginning when she'd toddle in with daddy, usually, unintentionally sending the fruit and veges rolling down the isle. The myriad of friendly Filipino helpers who wave and call out to Ava wherever we go in our ‘hood. (I'm constantly surprised at the number of people my blondie actually knows.) This has been our small village, well and truly alive amongst the madness of Asia's World City... and for that, I’m forever grateful. I can only hope we will encounter some of the kindness this village has shown us, in Xi’an, China....where another city of 8-million awaits. Do you have a village in an unexpected place, that gets you through your daily life? Tell me! Psssst... If you want to keep up to date with the latest from China, and you haven't already, make sure you subscribe to the blog. Click here.. … [Read more...]
Beyond the Five Star Gates, Poverty Knocks!
As we gear ourselves up to embark on our second expat gig; unlike last time, when we moved to Hong Kong - this time two have become three! Moving to China is not just about James' new job and mum's unbridled enthusiasm for adventure, it's also about the small person amongst us and what it means for her. Too small to understand the complexities of why we are moving to a different city, but big enough to know we must live away from family for the immediate future. Old enough to know daddy works in hotels, but too young to know not everyone can walk into a five star hotel and instantly have staff running to get you chocolate ice cream with sprinkles on top! There's no denying an expat life for kids is a lark! Travel, exotic experiences and more often than not, nannies at their beck and call. Throw in 5-Star shenanigans and it's plenty of poolside pampering, fancy food and hand-picked presents perfectly placed on your holiday 'heavenly' bed. This next gig will have us living IN the hotel...(not to mention in a city where blondies are looked upon with sheer wonder and amusement, especially pint-sized ones). So you can imagine, I am keen to make sure my little "Third Culture Kid" (yes that is a fair dinkum term) doesn't become too accustomed to the finer things in life at the click of her chubby fingers. (Of course, these rules need not apply to Mint Mocha-swilling mummies.) In all seriousness though, as we immerse ourselves into a life where untold luxury is at our fingertips - a life where groceries are supplied by the hotel chef, a driver takes us to our each and every destination and housekeepers keep our things in order, there's never been a more crucial time to remind ourselves that we must not become immune to the hardships of the world. A great reminder came just recently via my dad, who went to a work conference in Fiji. Just a short three hour flight from Australia, it was his first time to the neighbouring pacific island. After a few days in the popular tourist haven, he sent an email which sent goose bumps prickling all over my body....and was a stark reminder that in many, many countries right across the globe, usually not too far beyond the five star gates, lies a parallel universe, one that's more often than not steeped in poverty. This tiny paradise on Australia's doorstep, was no exception. In Fiji, 250,000 people live in poverty. Forget five star feasts, facials, foot massages and frolicking in paradise, beyond the palm fringed beaches, its back to the bare basics... and in these traditional island villages life is all about the three F's - family, farming and fishing. What my dad experienced reminded me very much of my trip to Kenya, Africa in 2007...perhaps it's why the story resonates so well with me. After volunteering at an orphanage in rural Kenya we travelled south to the Mombasa coast. A postcard-picture perfect beach was flanked with leisure laden pockets of paradise, while a stone's throw away, locals lived in mud homes without power. To me, this email captures a moment in time, delivering a poignant message that all too often gets lost in today's fast-paced, frenzied society, monopolized by modern day manipulations and the eternal quest for material possessions. He wrote: "Fiji has been a reality check. The poverty is in your face. There is a definite misconception about this pocket sized utopia. Sure, there are cheap air fares to this tropical paradise, but it's also very third world - local communities are craving for the bare basics. On Tuesday, 30 managers (including myself) embarked on a support mission to a very poverty stricken area, just one hour (in the bush) from our luxurious five star hotel. I was confronted with no electricity, poor housing and no roads….in a place where 900 houses exist…each with just two rooms, it was hot, dry and dusty . But what stood out immediately, above and beyond the realities of this shanty town were the big smiles! A complete reality check unravelled before me. In the morning I painted. In the afternoon, I mixed concrete. English was minimal and it was sign language between me and my Fijian workmate - who was maybe 30 - all the way. He used two fingers to indicate dry cement and seven fingers for gravel mix. On we went, all day, drying and mixing, a dynamic duo. "Keep up 'whitey' - shovel faster," he joked….it felt like we were part of the chain gang! This guy earns $2.05 an hour, but oh how happy he was. At the end of the day we washed up; exhausted he shook my hand. It was emotional. I go home soon - to a bed , a great family, a car. I travel. I enjoy at times much more than I need. I handed him 20 dollars…he says 'No boss!' I say, 'Go to the pub, have a beer…' This was more than a day's pay for him…but for me it was a truly humbling, once in a life time experience. I saw my granddaughters, three and two respectively - little Ava’s and Lillie's, everywhere. Another group of managers made bed bunks… You know these little guys, until they received the bunks, had never slept in a bed. I helped deliver a bed to a family at the end of the day. A little Lillie, the same age caught my eye…I went and chatted and I told her about my girls…she was shy…I kept chatting to her and at last...came a beaming smile! I said goodbye and trekked off back to the bus, air conditioned with soft seats… As we moved off, I looked out the window, here was the little girl with her sister (an Ava) waving, a big toothy smile. My goodness I will always remember that big smile. The stand out is this hotel, flushed with all the amenities you could ever ask for, yet just 20 minutes out, utter poverty…nothing except the bare necessities. But it's these people, who have nothing in life but each other, who showcase the very best in humanity." Thanks for the brief reminder Poppy. All too often, we get caught up with how much we don't have. How many of us are guilty of enjoying the finer things in life without giving much thought to those that go without, really go without? Whether it's a dinner out, a new outfit, or the ability to go on holidays and stay at a luxury hotel, it's all too easy to forget (or turn a blind eye to) the harsh realities might be lurking just around the corner! Next time you grumble or complain the water's not hot enough or your cheese platter is a little on the lean side.... remember not too far from your five star paradise there just might be a family grinning from ear to ear about a plate of dusty rice to share and a wooden bunk to clamber into. A life lesson I surely hope we can teach our Ava and Lillie. What about you? Do you have similar stories of your own? I'd love to hear. Leave me a comment! … [Read more...]
Stop the Press: We’re Moving to China!
Almost four years on board the expat train in the multi-layered metropolis of Hong Kong, it's time to call it a day. I knew this post was coming… in fact I've known since the day we decided to pull up stumps and relocate from our home in Australia -- that one day it would all come to an end. To be honest with you, the day I stepped foot in humid, heaving Honkers - I already had my eyes on the finish line. I'll give it two years (at best) I thought, then we'll go home. But with time comes acceptance, assimilation and ultimately adoption. I've unexpectedly fallen in love with this intoxicating city, enough to start a serious relationship and call it home - 43 floors up. In fact, I've spent more of my married life in Asia's World City than in Australia and have experienced the biggest life-changing event of all in the city that (appropriately) never sleeps - motherhood! When my toddler asks where she's from it's Hong Kong (Kowloon to be precise) her home is a very tall building called Gwun Lum Tin Ha and she thrives on a diet of dim sum and rice. Truth be told, I've also (surprisingly) become a little bit addicted to expat life. It sneaks up on you. Before you know it, you're hailing cabs like a woman possessed, wielding chopsticks with an element of finesse and crowd jamming with the best of 'em. For the last 18 months though, 'normal' life has been interspersed with a roller coaster ride of emotions - heart racing moments, highs and lows, plenty of what ifs, what next and how the hell?! With a husband in hotels, they like you to progress and conquer, meaning the next role is never too far out of sight. There's an unspoken rule…don't get too comfortable, for soon it will be time to move on. This time it's for 'top dog' -- General Manager -- the very reason we started this expat journey. The ball started rolling as the clock struck midnight 2013! No sooner had we clinked champagne glasses, pondering what the future may hold …the phone literally lit up with calls. (Who needs fireworks!) First cab off the rank (unexpectedly) Sydney! Yes! Sydney!! It wasn't for top dog. But it was Sydney!! Our home. It's like being offered your favourite pair of warm fluffy slippers after you thought you'd lost them or a warm blanket when you've been out in the cold too long. So very tempting to slot back into that old life where good friends, good jobs, a city we love and precious family not too far away, co-exist all in One. Single. Place. Really - what's to think about? Call us crazy (yes the really loopy in the head kind of crazy if you must) but… it wasn't time. It was too soon. We realized then and there, when fate slapped us in the face, we'd changed. The excitement of living amongst a different culture, constantly learning and forever adapting -- being in a place where each day brings new surprises, some good, some bad and some just plain bizarre had caught us in its grip, more tightly than we'd ever anticipated….and so we said no to Sydney -- for now. Then a month later, Wuhan, China came knocking at our door. And just when we thought we were hardened expats, ready to embrace the next big adventure, Wuhan wobbled us off our expat axis…. With two days to decide, we took a frantic flight to the place they call Asia's furnace. I'll spare you the drama, but if you missed it, you can read about the slightly harrowing, yet enlightening experience in my previous post - Do All Roads Lead to China? So, feeling weary and weighed down with the pressure of making the right decision again, we wiped our brow, took a few deep breaths, dusted Wuhan off and carried on enjoying life in the fragrant harbour. Breathing in Hong Kong air never felt so good! Then, about a month later, just chilling on the couch, a late night email came through. This time - the arrow had spun around, landing on - Bangkok! We tried to contain our excitement, hide our smug grins (it is the 'Land of Smiles' after all). This was the prize winning lotto ticket (after Hong Kong). We could do this! No consideration necessary. A quick google search for the hotel… it met all our expectations - perfect for a first time GM. A sparkling city boasting plenty of culture and charisma. As any expat would know, when you get this kind of call, as much as your head tells you sternly not to start planning, you let a little bit of your imagination run away….just a little. You start picturing what daily life in that country might look like. Where you might live. What you might do each day? Imagine yourself walking the streets amongst the Tuk Tuks, temples and famous Thai cuisine. A new culture to explore and conquer. We're in! But we weren't. Disappointed, you tell yourself it's not to be. About now, a little bit of panic sets in. What's next then, will China call again? Brace yourself, you can't say no forever. You also breathe a small sigh of relief, knowing it buys you extra time. Time in your haven where you can almost pretend you're not going anywhere. Life goes on as normal - school run, work, socializing, trips away, shopping….doctor's appointments. But just as you let your guard down, relax and almost convince yourself you're here to stay, the inevitable happens. When my husband comes home from work in the middle of the day, bearing a Mint Mocha, I know it's serious. "How does Melbourne sound?" he says ever so half heartedly. Then more enthusiastically, "This time it's top dog!" My heart skips a beat. We've got 24 hours. 24 hours to make a decision to put ourselves forward as one of three candidates for a role which could potentially change our lives. We talk it through…over and over. We text family… we try to get a feeling one way or the other. It's home but it's not really home. It's still too far from family. It's a great opportunity but is it a great move financially? Great city, but we're not convinced it's for us. We can't decide. There are tears of frustration, heated words. We make a list of pros and cons. We think we should go…but when it comes down to it, we realise, neither of us really wants to. What's happened to us? They joke people (namely expats) get lost in Asia. Is this us? Much to the surprise (shock) of friends and family we decline Melbourne and deep down know this may very well be a decision we long live to regret. But still, we feel OK. We know we've got unfinished business in Asia. If we end expat life now and go home, we'll never know where it may have taken us. Another few weeks go by after the emotional upheaval… and again 'normality' resumes, that is until we hear the top spot at one of the company's other hotels in Hong Kong is up for grabs. Could this be ours? A chance to stay in Hong Kong! Is it too good to be true? Yes it is. This one's got a list as long as my arm and we're not at the top. My husband's getting itchy feet …should we have gone home? Are we going to end up in the back of China? Probably. It's hard to make plans….how long have we got? Do I sign up for that work event? Should Ava start her new school? Should I say yes to that Junk boat invitation next month. Can we book a flight home? Then it happens again, lying in bed one night, another day is over…James quickly checks his emails - a few expletives…then, "The W Koh Samui - They want to put me forward as one of three!" Uh oh.. here we go again….a restless night ensues, simultaneously, we toss and turn. Another long three weeks go by, waiting…waiting - stomach in knots…is this the one? I've never been to Koh Samui, but it's hard not to have heard about it. That famous Leonardo DiCaprio movie The Beach springs to mind. Amazing location. But an island? - me on an island? Until recently we'd all but ruled-out resorts. Too isolating for us city slickers we'd joked and brushed the idea under the carpet. But after the last six months, lazy days by the pool suddenly sound very inviting. I picture a relaxed, family lifestyle, lots of delicious writing overlooking the powdery white sand and crystal clear waters…life in a variety of techni-coloured sarongs. Am I dreaming? From 7-million to 62,000 people! Suffice to say, I was dreaming, it didn't eventuate. Disappointed, again, we take a collective sigh and try to carry on as normal. The next email comes a month later. The desert heat of Doha is calling. I'm scared because it's the Middle East and it's not familiar, but I'm also keen because I actually know people there. This could work….I start to envisage Arabian nights under the stars, but after a month the project is placed on the back burner and the idea of camel rides in the sand is quickly blown away. Hot on its heels comes Goa, in India! By this point my husband is calmly throwing these locations out there over dinner and I'm usually replying with a nervous half chuckle, too scared to acknowledge it might be the one. I've never heard of Goa but our English friends tell us it's the perfect island city. Again my imagination does a little dance and I think about life on a diet of curries and a place where cows roam the streets. But again I'm quietly anxious. It's a time when India is front and centre in the news for all the wrong reasons… So, maybe it's just as well the powers that be rendered Goa not the place for us. Swallow, inhale, exhale, repeat! At this point I'm stuck between desperately wishing for a crystal ball and just forgetting this limbo land exists! My iPhone weather app seriously can't take any more cities. But it's going to have to. A little town in China comes up called Heifei. Unfortunately a quick google tells me it's one of Asia's 'other' furnaces. This little town has seven million people and it's still considered a backwater! The city's nickname "nowheresville" jumps out at me from my screen. I anxiously read on and discover it's a place where people can't park their own cars. I picture myself being flagged down by rich Chinese in Mercedes and asked to parallel park for them. We say no to Heifei. It's not long before bikinis are back on the agenda. It's Bali but a sideways move for James. We debate the merits and as much as we'd love to dabble in the Island of Gods, it defeats the purpose of this adventure. Relaxing back home over a little Christmas lunch with the family Down Under, the faraway land of Seoul in South Korea springs up! On paper, it sounds oh so very sophisticated, but by this point in the game we barely bat an eyelid… just as well because by New Year, Seoul is off the cards. Another day comes, another Chinese city. ChongQing. The third furnace in China… also known as the 'fog city.' Somehow we narrowly escape this one. Then Macau is placed in our laps and we almost somersault with unbridled excitement! It seems like a done deal and while it lacks the excitement of exploring a new, unknown culture, a stone's throw from Hong Kong it gives us the opportunity to cling onto much of our old life. We happen to be in Macau on a weekend holiday so we snap pictures outside the half built hotel, daring to wonder if this will become a significant moment in our future. But our snaps end up being deleted. Macau is not where we belong. Our brief love affair is over. Then… just when I start to think we might be destined to remain in Hong Kong, along comes a place we realize we can't refuse. Oh yes, it seems the path to China is set in stone (or rather clay) and truthfully we almost sigh with relief at this point. Our new home is also home to those famous Terracotta Warriors. Xi'an means Western Peace and is regarded as one of the fourth oldest cities in the world, along with Rome, Cairo and Athens, although I'm pretty sure it's not nearly as esteemed. But what I'm comforted by, is it has character and it has soul (and it's not the fourth furnace)! The odds are surely in my favour, there are direct flights to the Gold Coast and there's a Starbucks opposite the hotel. Xi'an, you had me at hello! Something tells me this is where the real expat journey begins….(thank god for those few Mandarin lessons….and thank you Beijing Mandarin for teaching me how to order a Mint Mocha in Mandarin today!) So, it's time to say 'thank you' Hong Kong. Thank you for showing me a life I could never have imagined in my wildest dreams. As excited about this new adventure as I am, I'm also slightly terrified! So stick with me, because I'll see you on the other side! Pssst, i'm almost positive you'll have a very good picture of Xi'an by the time we leave, but here's a short video to give you a sneak preview. Anyone interested in the Westin Xi'an.... this is what it looks like! … [Read more...]