SPONSORED POST Y'all know I'm very picky when it comes to running sponsored posts on Mint Mocha Musings - but this one had me at hello. It's such an important one for so many of us the world over right now, no matter which part of it we live in. In the past year, if you're a parent, it's highly likely you have home schooled at some stage, many for much longer than others...and many are still going. Lockdown during the coronavirus pandemic has brought about a period of enormous change and uncertainty. For children school closures were sudden, forcing them and their parents to quickly adapt as they faced a long and uncertain period of home schooling.As children return to school, uncertainty and the need to adapt to change remains. Social distancing measures may mean that school will be different to how it was before the lockdown. For some pupil’s school times may change or they may only attend two or three days per week. In the classroom, students may be divided into smaller groups andsocialising restricted. It is important to prepare children for this new experience and the challenges it may bring. For that reason, I'm more than happy to team up with Allianz Care to bring you some tips on how to adjust to the new school year. Talk to your child about their concerns Your children may have the usual concerns about going back to school, but, they may also be concerned about the impact of coronavirus and what the school experience will be like.If your child is anxious or worried, talk to them about the concerns they are having about returning to school. Reassure them their feelings are normal and emphasise that you and their school are making every effort to minimise any impact on their school experience. Let them know that you and their teachers are always available to listen and want to help in any way.Many children will have been missing their friends and routine during the coronavirus confinement period. The return to school will be seen as a welcome return to normal. Remind your child of the positives Talk with your child about what they are most looking forward to about going back to school, and remind them of all the positives that school life brings. Talk to your child’s teachers Talk to your child’s teachers before talking with your child about the return to school, ensuring you are fully informed about what will stay the same when school returns and what will change. There may be specific requirements that your child’s school has put inplace which both you and your child need to be aware of and adhere to. Remember your child’s school and teachers are available to help answer your queries, so don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Talk with your child’s teachers or school principal if you have uncertainties or concerns about the new school experience. Prepare your child for what to expect. When you are informed of what to expect and what safety protocols have been put in place by your child’s school, relay this information back to your child in a positive and age appropriate manner. Ensure your child knows what to expect so there are no surprises. If your child will be required to wear a face covering during school time, let them know. Have them practice wearing the face covering, so that they are comfortable wearing it, and ensure they have an extra supply of face coverings should they need them. In addition, teach your child thecorrect way to wear their face covering. Putting on a face covering: They should wash their hands thoroughly before touching the face covering. They should ensure the face covering has no holes or tears. If the face covering has ear loops, they should hold the covering by the ear loops and put the loops around each ear. If the face covering has ties, they should hold the covering by the ties and bring the covering to their nose and tie securely. They should place the face covering securely over their mouth and nose, ensuring there are no gaps. They should be able to breathe easily. What should be avoided when wearing a face covering. They should avoid touching their face covering while wearing the face covering. They should not use a wet or soiled face covering. They should not wear a loose-fitting face covering. They should not rest the face covering around their neck or on their forehead. They should not share face coverings with other pupils. When speaking they should not lower their face covering. They should dispose of face coverings safely and hygienically. Remind your child about the importance of hand hygiene. Reassure your child the measures which the school has in place are to help ensure their safety and that of their teachers and classmates. Remind them that they too must do their bit to prevent any spread of coronavirus by washing their hands regularly and practicing good cough and sneeze etiquette. Get back into routine. Regular routine may have gone awry during the confinement period, in particular, your child may not have had a set bedtime and getting up time. To help ease the back to school transition, it is important to gradually re-establish routines in advance of the first day back.Help your child adjust by setting appropriate bed times and waking up times. During confinement your child may have stayed in their pyjamas for longer in the morning or have become used to morning TV while you tried to address other work and home commitments.Re-establish a morning routine for your child which prioritises getting dressed, brushing their teeth and hair and eating breakfast. Revise some maths, writing and reading. You may have let home schooling slide for a while, in advance of your child returning to school help them transition by undertaking some age appropriate reading, maths or writing.Your child may have concerns about having fallen behind in their studies, reassure them that everyone has been in the same situation and their teachers are prepared to help get everyone back on track. Keep the conversation going. When school finally does reopen and your child begins to settle into their new routine, ensure that you keep the dialogue going. Ask them how their day has been, and let them know that you are available to address any concerns or worries that they may have. Be sure to check in with their teachers to find out how they are progressing.The return to school will be a significant milestone for your child, and may present challenges. However, with some advance planning and good communication between you, your child and their school, you can reduce any detrimental impact on your child’s wellbeing and education. Allianz Care international health insurance can help members and their children with the transition back to school, they provide you with an Assistance Programme, where you can speak with a professional who can offer support. The service offers confidential support formental, financial, physical and emotional wellbeing and is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year. … [Read more...]
CHINA BLONDE: How a newsreader’s search for adventure led to friendship, acceptance….and peroxide pandemonium in China.
Hello my friends! Break out the champers, because CHINA BLONDE - the memoir is here!!! If you've been following Mint Mocha Musings for awhile now, like I know so many of you loyally have since 2012 (yes it's been that long), you've probably heard me talking about writing a book.... a lot. And, you've probably wondered if I was making it up -- I don't blame you, it's taken that bloody long! But let me tell you, there is nothing remotely quick about writing a book. I've always wanted to write a book, don't all journos think they've got a book in them? Ha! Probably. But, in all reality, I had no idea what my first book would be about....that is until I got to China. Then it all became 'oh so clear'. Xi'an - this fascinating second-tier city of nine million people, the first ancient capital of China. A city bearing thousands of years of history. Fascinating... until I had to live there. You may remember, culture shock hit me head on like a lightening bolt. Waking up that very first morning, daring to peek outside the hotel window, I felt like I couldn't breathe. Sure, I'd lived in Hong Kong for four years, the Pearl of the Orient. I'd been spoilt and I'd grown to love the glittering harbour city so fiercely, I wanted to call it my forever home. I also, rather foolishly, thought the fragrant harbour had me prepared for mainland China. How wrong I was. … [Read more...]
Gidday, Ni Hao, Kia Ora……Can You Have More Than One Hometown?
What’s the first thing you ask someone you’ve just met? “Where are you from?” Or “Where’s home for you?” Especially if you’re an expat, right. The words literally roll off your tongue, after, “Hi, I’m So and So.” And even if you’re not living overseas, it doesn’t take long for the inevitable question to crop up in conversation, “So, is this your hometown?” I never quite know what to say to that - "Well, I'm from Australia, but I was born in New Zealand....but we've been living in Asia, ummmm." Recently, I went back to my place of birth, New Zealand. It’d been 15 years! Needless to say, I was taken aback when the friendly lady at Customs said “Welcome Home!” And just quietly, it had me feeling a little bit nostalgic. Living overseas, as in not Australia, for a significant chunk of that 15 years, meant it was no longer a hop, skip and a jump across the ditch and well, life just got in the way. This time though, I had my husband, my Small Person and my mum along for the ride. I invited (some may say coerced) them into taking a trip down memory lane with me. We went back to the suburb I grew up in, we did a drive-by past several of my old houses, my primary school - still looking startling familiar after 40 years, and we pulled into the carpark of my old high school… which was also my mum’s! (Oh the memories!) We even, at my insistence, went down to the beach, where I made my first sandcastles and spent hours wiling away the dreamy days of an idyllic childhood with my grandparents, who’ve long passed. The trip back, got me thinking about the importance of place. Psychologist say, memories are cued by the physical environment. When you visit a place you used to live, these cues can cause you to revert back to the person you were when you lived there. The rest of the time, different places are kept largely separated in our minds. (Sorry if I reverted back to that sulky teenager who lived on a diet of potato scallops and milkshakes.) Does our birth place hold a piece of our heart, indefinitely? Growing up spending many a school holiday on my granddad’s boat, I'm definitely at my calmest and happiest when there’s water within my eye’s reach. Obviously, the factors that influence our identities are too numerous and complex to investigate in this single post but just how much or how little our birthplace shapes us, it seems, after doing some research of my own, is still debatable. For me, after 31 years in Australia, give or take a few, I feel more like an Aussie than a Kiwi. There’s little trace left of the former ‘fush n chups’ accent (except when I’m tired or have too many vinos); the sunburnt country long ago captured my heart. But here’s the clincher, I’m still not an Aussie citizen. Gasp! (Luckily, I’m not going into politics!) A couple of reasons have stopped me, mostly I credit laziness to this inability to take the citizenship test! I mean, I’ve covered more Australia Days as a journalist than I’ve had burnt sausages on a barbie. And in those early days, being a Kiwi in Oz, didn’t have much of an impact on those all important things, like free university tuition, etc.. But maybe, just maybe there’s a little bit of guilt or is it reluctance to let go? Does giving up your allegiance to your home country mean you’re saying goodbye to your past? (There was no dual citizenship back then.) I still find myself torn whenever the All Blacks are playing the Wallabies (I mean we all know who’s going to win, don’t we)? ;-) And I get a chill down my spine when the Haka plays - sometimes I have to stop myself from launching into the actions. When I’m called on to recite a song (and this happens more than you might think) I always choose the Maori song, Tutira Mai Nga Iwi, I learned in primary school. And I still miss certain things unique only to the Land of the Long White Cloud. Namely and most importantly my family members who still reside there, and I’m still partial to a Chocolate Thins biscuit, a Snifter or a glass of L & P. People often tell me, the fact that Ava, our small person, was born in Hong Kong and lived in Asia until she was six years old will have a big impact on her. Will it, I wonder? She’s what they call a Third Culture Kid (TCK) - a phrase coined by an American sociologist, referring to a child who’s spent a significant part of their formative years outside their parents culture. (Her Dad's English just to add to the equation.) People who fit the TCK bill have a tendency to mix and merge their birth culture with their adopted culture, creating one of their own: a third culture. Born in Hong Kong to a New Zealand-born mum, an English dad, (both her and him with Aussie citizenship) and three formative years in Xi'an China. Where's home? There’s no denying she’s more at home with chopsticks; and dim sum and rice are her favourite foods. She's more au fait with Chinese New Year than Australia Day, and perhaps it’ll be a favourite Chinese song she remembers in time over an Aussie one. Ask her where she’s from - it's undoubtedly Hong Kong. But Australia's blue skies and endless parks have definitely hit her sweet spot. For me, living in Hong Kong and Xian, my roots became more poignant than ever. So far away from everything I knew, we celebrated ANAC Day and Australia day with more gusto than I ever had on home soil. Even Melbourne Cup pulled on the heart strings. Experts say place does shape us at a fundamental level. We all learn to communicate and understand our world through sharing language, customs, behaviours, beliefs and values. And in all reality, doesn't each town, city, state and country has it’s own local vocabulary, accents, values, ideas, economies, industries, local newspapers and radio stations? In essence, it’s very own unique culture. Heck, in China each province has its own culinary delights. Winston Churchill famously proclaimed that “we shape our buildings, and afterwards, our buildings shape us. I’ve stolen this quote from Cup of Jo’s fabulous blog, by actress Helen Mirren, “Where you grew up becomes a big part of who you are for the rest of your life. You can’t run away from that. Well, sometimes the running away from it is what makes you who you are.” Identity is attached to a sense of belonging, usually through family ties or deep emotional connections and it's pretty evident we all bare some of the cultural and emotional legacies, whether good or bad from our hometowns. Environmental psychologist Susan Clayton says: “For better or worse, the place where we grew up usually retains an iconic status. Is it any wonder memories of finding and eating oysters off the rocks at five years old are forever etched in the bowels of my mind. The iconic Pacific oyster! It might not be home now, but saying “Haere Ra…..” (Goodbye) forever to New Zealand was never really an option And as Henning Mankell says, "You can have more than one home. You can carry your roots with you and decide where they grow." I like that idea. What do you think? Do you have one home or many? To read more about where home is, check out The Expat Magazine's article Where is Home? here Read, about our repatriation back Down Under here... … [Read more...]
Why My Six Year Old is Learning Chinese, Down Under.
When Ava was just three years old, she started coming home from pre-school spouting off words, phrases, even songs in Chinese, which to be honest, I thought was merely 'toddler gibberish'. That is, until we were out to dinner one night, and a friend pointed out the seemingly un-obvious, to me, “You know she’s counting to ten in Mandarin, right?” “Er, what?!” In Hong Kong, they like to start school at a young age; competition is fierce and in such a heavily populated metropolis it’s believed, education is the key to success. Born in the fragrant harbour, at the tender age of two and a half my daughter’s class had both a full time English teacher and full time Mandarin teacher. At parent-teacher interviews, the Mandarin teacher attempted to explain Ava’s progress in Mandarin. "Say what?!" I knew I had to up my game, so I enrolled myself in online Mandarin classes. (I wrote about the beginning of that journey here.) It was just as well, because within a year, we moved to the middle of China, where, unlike Hong Kong, English was rarely spoken. For someone who spoke only one language (and a handful of school French phrases), learning Mandarin (one of the world’s most complex languages) was suddenly at the top of our entire family’s ‘to do’ list, even the hoteliers! My Small Person, who was at an international school had Mandarin lessons four times a week during our two and a half years in Xi'an, and for the most part, detested them! I soon learned she was much happier getting in on my weekly tutored lessons, where our young, enthusiastic teacher 'Vera' played games and did craft with her, in Chinese. She also had a great friendship with our Chinese babysitter where the benefits were mutual. Ava would teach the babysitter English and she would teach her Mandarin. Despite my skepticism, everyone told me she really could understand Chinese. Actually in the end, we made quite a formidable team. She was far better at understanding, and I found it easier, speaking Mandarin. After seven years away, we're back in Sydney and to be honest, I’m a little surprised, despite Mandarin being the most commonly spoken language in the world (with over one billion speakers), it’s still only taught in a handful of Aussie schools. Australia might lay claim to being one of the most multicultural countries in the world, yet learning a second language is still not compulsory in many primary schools. For those schools that take it upon themselves, the language of choice is predominately French, German, Indonesian or Spanish; or in my daughter’s case, Italian (which just quietly, she loves!) Research tells us, learning any language at any age is beneficial and learning a language as a child, should almost be a rite of passage. Author of ‘Why Bilinguals Are Smarter’ says, “Evidence suggests the bilingual experience improves the brain’s so-called 'executive function' — a command system that directs the attention processes that we use for planning, solving problems and performing various other mentally demanding tasks.” Sounds impressive?! A study from Pennsylvania State University has found learning a foreign languages provides a competitive edge in career choices, enhances listening skills and memory, and improves the knowledge of one's own language. Multilingual people, especially children, are skilled at switching between two systems of speech, writing, and structure. As an added bonus, according to Macquarie University’s Senior Lecturer in Literacy in a Multicultural Society, Dr Robyn Moloney, says, “After learning a secondary language, subsequent languages are easier to learn - patterns can be recognised a lot faster.'' So no matter what language my now six year old is learning, be it Italian, French or Spanish, for now, I’m pretty happy. But, still, we’re keeping up the Mandarin. For her and for me! (The hotelier on the other hand has called it a day, and I can hardly blame him!) Some friends have asked, why we don’t we just let it go, now that we’re back on Aussie soil? Touche! “It’s a pretty tough language, isn’t it?” They query. And yes, it bloody is! Sometimes I'd rather poke sticks in my eye than have a lesson. The same word can mean four different things, depending on the tone you use! Chinese people will even admit to being confused by their own language! (Not kidding!) We definitely don’t need it the minute we step foot outside our front door anymore, or do we? In 2017, China is Australia's biggest trading partner. By 2020, Chinese visitors to Australia are expected to top the one million mark and pump as much as $13 billion a year into the national economy. Yep! One thing’s for sure, it’s the Asian Century and our Zhonguo Ren friends aren’t going away. Consider this: At the moment only eight per cent of the country’s 1.4 billion people actually own a passport. You don’t have to be a mathematician to work out what’s going to happen as the growing (wealthy) middle class increases. There are still millions of Chinese who’ve never travelled outside of China. Speaking at a recent ACRI ‘in conversation’ event I went to, Colin Mackerras, Australian Professor at Griffith University, said learning about Chinese culture and the language should be regarded as an asset. “There is an emerging Middle Class in China and it’s going to have a big impact on the world, I don’t think we’ve seen anything like it in history.” Australia China Business Council president, John Brumby says, "The booming Chinese middle class is attracted to Australia for tourism and education, based in part on the clean air, orderly cities and desire of wealthy parents to provide the best for their children." Having spent two years in an often extremely polluted Xi’an, where chaos reigns supreme and education is everything, he’s on the money. There are also increasing numbers of Chinese students coming Down Under to study. According to the Australian China Relations Institute, 140,000 to be precise! This new generation is a curious bunch, keen to see what the Western world they’ve often only ever seen in movies or on television shows like ‘Friends’ (it’s one of the few western shows they’ve been able to have access to) is really all about. So, why the resistance to teaching Mandarin in schools? Even the federal government says we should “promote, protect and even privilege the learning of Chinese in our schools.” The front page of the London Times ran the headlined story ‘Ni hao! The British school where half the day is in Mandarin.’ The theme - parents are hoping to ‘future proof’ their children at a prep school that immerses pupils in Chinese. It’s well documented that we have a natural ability to learn languages more easily at a young age. Professor of second-language acquisition at the University of Maryland, Robert DeKeyser, believes the ability to absorb a new language effortlessly begins to decline by the age of six. Having studied Mandarin alongside my six year old, I know which one of us has had an easier time picking up the language! Even so, I still get howls of protest when it’s time for lessons. To make it more fun, I’ve engaged a uni student from China’s far north to come over to our place and effectively play games in Chinese, and have a chat to me in Chinese afterwards. I figure as long as she doesn't hate it, i'm on track, for now, anyway. Chinese strongly believe in the proverb: “Shou ren yi yu buru shou ren yi yu!” You’ll know it as, “Give a man a fish, feed him for a day, teach him to fish, feed him for a lifetime.” So while my small person likes to complain about “yet another Chinese lesson”, I plan to do everything in my power to make sure she’s ‘future proofed.’ … [Read more...]
Don’t Call Us ‘Leftovers!’ China’s Unmarried Women Hit Back at Ikea.
The 30 second television advert begins with a tense family dinner scene. A young woman turns apprehensively towards her mother and says ”Ma Ma…” Her mother cuts in, bangs down her chopsticks and says scathingly (in Mandarin of course) "If you don't bring home a boyfriend next time, then don't call me Mum!” Next minute, there’s a knock at the door and a well-dressed young man appears with a bouquet of flowers. “This is my boyfriend,” the daughter says proudly. Her now beaming parents, whip out their best (Ikea) tableware and home decorations, inviting him in. Let me tell you, today, in much of China, that scene is too not far from the truth, but this latest Ikea advertisement has caused an almighty uproar amongst local netizens. In 2007, the China Women’s Federation, coined the phrase ‘Sheng Nu’ for all Chinese women who were not married by the ripe old age of 27! Yes, 27! Translated, Sheng Nu means ‘Leftover Women.’ That may have only been ten years ago but traditionally China has long made matrimony the final and ultimate goal for a Chinese girl. Even ‘Confucious’ is known to have said, “The woman follows the man! In her youth she follows her father and elder brother; when married, she follows her husband; when her husband is dead, she follows her son.” Marriage is about fulfilling ones duty and having societal stability rather than love. The ‘one child policy’ introduced in the early 80’s saw families favouring sons over daughters meaning an astronomical number of abortions and female babies abandoned. Today that means there’s a dire shortage of women when it comes to pairing up in matrimonial heaven. Currently there are 117 boys for every 100 girls. Men outnumber women by 33.66 million. But while ultimately men are the ones having more difficulty finding a match, women still face heavy pressure from family and society. So much so, many are resorting to renting ‘fake' boyfriends to take back to their home villages, during the annual Chinese New Year holiday. A lot of young Chinese I’ve spoken with, say, despite being highly educated with thriving careers, the pressure from mum and dad is very real. Older generations still feel they need to ‘save face’ in their immediate communities and if their daughter, turns up unmarried without children, it’s terribly embarrassing. “A parent is always on standby to sacrifice everything for their children.” a friend in her fifties says. It’s widely accepted they will be the one’s looking after the grandchildren while their children work and in return their child/ren will look after them in old age. A lot of parents are even taking matters into their own hands, fronting up, weekly to ‘marriage markets’ with their children’s statistics on a piece of paper. Height, gender, education, job, and property ownership! “My mother keeps calling me and reminding me I only have a couple more years to find someone,” comments a weary 25-year-old friend. Another married friend, Monica, says, “Almost all Sheng Nu are really good students in school; they don’t have the time to go outside with friends or meet people. Their parents introduce them to potential husbands, but when they meet, they struggle to communicate ..they just know how to study. It’s a big problem.” Men though aren’t escaping the wrath of unsatisfied parents. “My mother told me I must get married and it’s her duty to see that I do.” says 28 year old Leo. “I argue with her that the choice is mine, why is it your duty?” “She says, she’ll lose face, all my friends say, why don’t you plan a marriage for your son?" She says, When I’m with friends who have grandchildren, I feel bad and embarrassed and walk away.” Leo says, “She is transferring her pressure onto me.” I ask one friend if it’s weird to her, that I got married so late at 37, mainly because I’ll never forget those first few visits to the hair salon in Xi’an, when they all looked at me like I was from Mars, especially when I told them how old I was when I tied the knot! "And you think your 'Sheng Nu' have got problems!" :lol: Encouragingly though, many of China’s young educated women I talk to are pushing back against the leftover stereotype and waiting until they find love, regardless of their parents expectations. Hence why Ikea’s latest ad hit a sore spot. Lu Tiao from the hair salon says, “I want a soul mate with a modern day approach who will support my career.” There’s even a new Chinese term that means ‘Naked Marriage’ - getting married purely for love without a house, ring, ceremony or car. Still - in a culture where many are still clinging onto the Chinese family idea of having many generations under one roof, it’s a tough one to get their head around. Ikea’s been forced to withdraw the ad and issue a nation wide apology, admitting it got it’s normally intrepid research, terribly wrong. This is China. … [Read more...]
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